Airsoft Ettiquete: Why You Can't Call Someone A Douchebag To Their Face

So, for those few who actually read my blog, you may have noticed that I have taken somewhat of an extended break. Since I am this type of guy, I'm going to frank. For a time I lost all inspiration to write about anything airsoft related. I know it sounds terrible and it was, but it is not nearly as terrible as when your wife's herpes starts acting up, so don't feel too sorry for me.

At this point, a noble and considerate person might apologize for his misdirection. However, I write this f*cking blog and you do not, so that is not going to happen. If you want to start your own blog and ignore your kids to write by all means go ahead. Then you can tell people to go f*ck themselves as I just did.

So, let's discuss airsoft etiquette or as I like to call it, remembering your Emily Post. For those of you who do not know, Emily Post was an author during the 19th century who wrote many well received books about proper etiquette in just about every situation imaginable.

To begin, I would like to share a story about a recent experience I had. I was in an airsoft forum related altercation with another member. My verbal abuse of this member was not vulgar, nor was it tasteless. It was hilarious, factual and somewhat witty. However, the most important thing is that it was out of line. Did I mean what I said? Yes. Do I regret what I said? No.

Why not?

Because I meant every damn word, living your life with regrets is an ingredient in the recipe to make your entire life a failure. Saying exactly what you think, develops a sense of satisfaction within ones self that is impossible to resist. That is why I do it all the time. Developing such a characteristic in your pallet does tend to earn you enemies, but if you are similar to me, you couldn't give a damn about what other people think.

So, some rules of etiquette for airsoft...

Yelling at Cheaters

I recently experienced a southern California field in which I and teammates were berated with insults during the game. The opfor was nice enough to inform me that I was a motherf*cking cheater numerous times. Was I cheating? No. Was it appropriate to interrupt our firefight to call me a cheater? Absolutely not. My captain was in attendance so I restrained myself from taking any action against these members of the opfor.

However, I greatly desired to inform him that I was not cheating and that the reason he may have thought so is because we are f*cking awesome at airsoft and he is not. Of course, I would let him know that this was in no way his fault, but the fault of his captains for providing poor leadership, his parents for turning him into a p*ssy and God for not respecting his parents enough to endow them with a child who had any f*cking common sense or tactical ability. But I digress; I made no such remark although it would undeniably be a benefit to this person.

Yelling at a cheater is in bad taste and completely unnecessary. Common courtesy states that all members of the airsoft community should be treated with equal respect on the field. This rule should be followed, even if they act like  f*cking retards, or play like a blind kid who's having a seizure. If someone is cheating simply inform an admin or continue to shoot this person until they decide to call it. If you would like to go back to the parking lot between games and tell your buddies what a *sshole that kid is do so, by all means that is your right.

Yelling at people can have egregious results.

1) Yelling at this person can make them feel singled out, creating a feeling of animosity and tension.

2) This tension and animosity can spread like a wild fire through community members, aggregating feeling of hostility among individuals who were not involved in the original incident.

3) If done by more respected and popular community members, this example may be followed and enacted by others who see this person as a pillar of their local airsoft community. This is another tool in developing tension and disrespect.

4) Victims of yelling may feel ostracized from other community members and lose interest in the hobby. This has the potential to greatly reduce the number of tangos you need to eliminate prior to completing the next objective.
I will continue discussing other airsoft related etiquette protocols in later entries.

I would like to say I am glad to be back. For those of you who have hounded me to continue creating witty and brilliant entries in my blog, I am happy to say that you can finally shut the f*ck up.