Ah, now we get to the heart of the matter.
Who doesn't want to be popular?
If your answer to this is no, then not only are you a liar, but you have come to terms with the fact that you are such a f*cking loser, the second coming could happen with the messiah blessing you himself in front a the world it wouldn't help a bit. Don't feel to bad, the world needs f*cking losers. Why you ask? To make guys like me look even cooler than we already are. I know, I know, I didn't think that was possible, but I guess it just shows us what a big loser you really are.
If you are mad at my loser comment, take comfort in the fact that your World of Warcraft buddies are probably online right now waiting for you to log on. You guys can chat about looting, pillaging and all the hot girls at school who will never talk to you because you look like ... well you look like you. See.... I made it better already.
Ok, so you're probably wondering about the theme of this blog entry. How do I know what can make you popular, right? Well if you think it's necessary let's talk credentials.
1) I'm Kirby.
2) I have a straight f*cking legit tier one operator look going on.
3) You want to be like me and during games you stand next to me just to hear the awesome things that come out of my mouth.
If that is not enough to satisfy you, then please stop reading my blog immediately, because you have less sense that a bag of sh*t covered in burnt dog hair. Seriously! I am one of the most beloved members of my community.
Man do I get off track!
So you want to be a superstar??
Steps 1-3...
Grow A Pair Of Balls
- Superstars exude confidence, in play, in person, online. Superstars act like they always know what the f*ck they are talking about. Now you are new to this theory so your confidence level may not be as high as you want it, but the key is ACTING like you know what the f*ck you are talking about. It's ok if you don't, not everybody does, but your purpose should be to exude enough confidence that others are convinced that your word is gospel. This doesn't mean hassling them until they believe you, just believe in yourself, keep your cool and the rest will follow. If someone says your wrong, look at them straight in the eye and don't say sh*t. Why? Because you don't have to prove sh*t to anybody you're a f*cking superstar.
Stay Cool
- Superstars don't loose their cool. Get shot in the face with an AEG at 10 ft? Stay cool. Shoot someone ten times and they don't call it? Stay cool. Here is why? Anyone can get upset, and wearing your emotions on your sleeve is a recipe for disaster.
In situations such as these, two things come from staying cool...
1) People are unable to read what you are thinking based on your appearance.
2) People who don't understand you learn to fear you, not in the sense that you will hurt them, but in the sense that you are unpredictable. Fear leads to respect, respect leads to developing your position of authority.
Don't Be To Cool For School
- Don't act like your better than everybody else. Acting like an elitist @sshole leads to disdain, not popularity or respect. You know what a major characteristic of a great leader is? Being in touch with those in your environment (the common man) and being aware of their needs. Winston Churchill, raging drunk, abusive to women, great f*cking leader. He held England's hand through World War II and they loved him for it. People will over look your faults if they can relate to you.
This might sound a little mushy, but think about it, did people really love Hitler? Or were they just scared sh*tless by him? During the later years of the war after the Germans lost Tunisia, Hitler's own field marshals and generals new that overall defeat was imminent. But did they say anything? No. Why? Not because he was beloved, but because they were afraid that if they spoke up they would be executed. People love one of their own, act like you care and people will follow. Act superior and you'll be left out in the cold alone, making witty remarks that no one will ever hear or care about.
Follow my recipe for success or don't, it's up to you. Does it work? Yes. How do I know? Experience. I am not saying this is 100% guaranteed... well yes actually I am saying that. If you try it and it doesn't work for you, then the problem is you, not the plan. Think I'm wrong? Come say it too my face the next time you see me and watch me not do sh*t about it, because I'm a f*cking superstar, I don't have to prove anything to anyone.
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